[Verse 1]
Can you tell me
How can one miss what she's never had
How could I reminisce when there is no past
How could I have memories of being happy with you boy
Could someone tell me how can this be
How could my mind pull up incidents
Recall dates and times that never happened
How could we celebrate a love that's to late
And how could I really mean the words I'm bout to say

I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take the time and reminisce
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said it's impossible to miss when you never had
Never almost had you


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|Sunday, March 29, 2009

4 more days to concert.
how are you guys feeling? =)

i'm fairly eggggggcited.
extremely anticipated..
and also kinda worried.

this year's one will be better than lasts'.
provided we can pull off the second half.
we know. to this point. audition items are all kinda crappy.
4 more days. Wat are you gonna make out of it?

I feel we as performers shouldnt be selfish.
if you cannot commit. its obvious, you wont be as good as the rest.
i mean. just compare the practice time..
for me,
i told Hazrul at the start of breaking..
if i cannot put up a freeze. i'll drop my solo.. get the bboys to replace me.
and wen gin didnt wan us to do bboy audition scene. i totally understood. so did kat steph and badd.
It all boils down to team work.. they work so hard!
and BECAUSE OF YOU. the whole fucking item will be pulled down.
why be so selfish?
if you can compare yourself to someone in the same position of you,
don forget to compare EVERYTHING with the person. EXAMPLE - TECHNIQUE.
well. you've only got yourself to prove now.
so don make us disappointed. and don pull your team down.

Its just a piece on my mind i have to say.
through so many performing experience,
we learn to compromise.
if ppl cannot do front roll, nvm. do side role. rite? =)

i'm gonna be changing my blog add..
its gonna be a diff name.. dozeoffnow. is so SEC SCH! hahahahhaa..
i've changed. =)

the garden in my heart.messed.
3:07 AM

|Wednesday, March 25, 2009

i changed my song! =D

this isnt the real post i typedd.
i suddenly felt that it was kinda inapproriate for blog.

still in doubts.
i hope it'll clear.
tts all i can say here!

-peace out-

the garden in my heart.messed.
9:26 AM

|Tuesday, March 24, 2009

yes. my hand is like crap.
didnt expect for such a thing to happen..
but.. shit does happen i guess..
its okay... i'll heal by next week.. and i can start kissing the floors again.
as for now.. chill it. it'll heal..

I miss you.
we've not talked for like since last last sat.
i dunno wats goin on..
but i still want this friendship.
so tell me wat i should do..
cos i really dont know wats happening..
and i cant help but admit that i do think about us everytime i take the train home. =(
it hurts me..
this is all so crappy..
its bothering me..

i now it sounds silly thinking that i'm sad for being chucked at the back for almost the entire dance. cos we all know maybe its not.
but.. its not bout them.. but more bout me..
am i really tt lousy?
i cant help but doubt my dance.
wat have i got to do to prove myself?
i agree. i don shine on stage.
i feel like there's this invisible box around me.
why cant i get it off?
i need to break out of it.. yea?

i wanna take some fresh air..

the garden in my heart.messed.
8:31 AM

|Saturday, March 21, 2009

i don get it.
how can you still not full out when instructions were given that its a run down?
so when do you want to wait until before you all start giving your all?

everytime you practice your step.
don just stupidly do it over and over again.
dance smart!
everytime you redo your steps..
aim on something to improve on..
there are so many things!
-extend you lines
-bigger movements
-more precise
-more expression
-what feel?
-correct alignment?
-how much more can you push froma step etc etc.

The problem with everyone now is that..
for every step that we're doing..
its all passing steps.
what happen to the accent, control, sharpness? tightness?
so many things to do..
so so little timee.
one more week left dudes.
what are you gonna make out of it?

still wanna mark steps?
people have the luxury of 6 months.
but we. TPDE. DONT.
so wake up. we need to pull it together.


its just me scolding me.
and sharing my point of view.
if it has impacted you. good.
if not. than walk it out.

-peace out-

the garden in my heart.messed.
9:23 AM

|Friday, March 20, 2009

my god. its friday again..
i cant believe how time is flying..

so im sitting in my chair now.. listening to my sis's complain.
its good at times like now.. i'm effing bored.

party night on wednesday was slightly different.
ok.. slightly was an understatement.
anyhow, hahaha. we had fun.
and thanks for the dare of having to get a guy buy us a drink.
steph and i were in such awkward situations! hahaha.
but fun la.. something new. =x
my popularity rate was also unusually high. weird.
and to think i was sticky and smelly and was in puma shoes.

Anywae. thursday was an off day from dance.
i basically spent as much time as i could with dad and mum.
i later accompanied mum to expo.
the Robinsons sale is going on..
its good stuff. cheap and nice!

2 weeks to concert.
sheesh. and i haven been able to fully absorb all the choreo i've learnt.
i'm also sure i'm not the only one..
ppl are constantly forgettin steps.
will gem4 be like gem 3 again?
you abit of mistake, i abit.. add together is a fucking hell load of SHIT.
so.. on my part. i'll clean up all my parts.
how bout you? =)

somehow things are changin..
erm.. it feels my world is rotating in a different direction..
sooo... i should go with it?
hmmm.. i dunno..

would you judge me i if told you wat happened?
is it right for you to judge?


the garden in my heart.messed.
7:50 AM

|Thursday, March 19, 2009

TPDE presents to you an all new dimension to a popular disney favourite, CINDERELLA. This drama/comedy musical with a zest of sexiness will be all thats worth doing on the 3/4 of april. We tell our story through dance, a lil bit of acting plus songs composed specially for this production. Its really one of a kind! Tickets are going out at $15 and are already selling fast. Make your way down to Temasek Polytechnic Auditorium 1 to be awed by us! SEE YOU THERE!

the garden in my heart.messed.
2:35 AM

|Monday, March 16, 2009

Yo peeps.
i stole these PEEKTURES so yall can see.
dope shit stuff. sick moves.
enjoy! =D

The 13 yr old air-flare boy. dope.

ouch! that rist is gonna hurt.

Wooo! go FUYO baby! i love you! hahahhahahahahaahhaha.

The man behing it all. =)

the garden in my heart.messed.
6:13 AM

|Saturday, March 14, 2009

i just came back from Radical Force jam.

seriously those who didnt go missed out.
the winners won hands down flat mann.
their combos were like bombs that set the entire zouk on fire.
and their individual freestyles were granites and machine guns!
from technic to power moves to musicallity...
it was in tip top standard.
i kinda tot that by the semi they would have already taken out their best moves already but i WAS WRONG!
the finals was like madnesss!!!!!!!!!!!
sorry! i sound so dramatic BUTTT
truely... i feel different now.
the impact it had on *jaw hangs loosely below the nose*

as for now...
my body is aching..
and my elbow hurts.
thank god, its friday..
i'm gonna get my full rest tmr.. and on mondayyyyyy
yes. mondayyyyyy...
its my TP test.
wish me good luck.

the garden in my heart.messed.
9:27 AM

|Wednesday, March 11, 2009


thank god its peace making time..
and i know i'm not in this alone..

so yes.
my heart is finally willing to put down all the unhappiness accumulated..

it hs been tiring.
and i miss the fun times we've had.
so lets call it to an end.

i've let go..
and i will shut out all other bad gossips.
from today on. its only SPREADING THE LOVE.
good night

the garden in my heart.messed.
11:35 AM

|Tuesday, March 10, 2009

The world is a funny place.
as you get more exposed to it, you see so many things you choosed you rather not.
then again, you love the feeling of reality.
randomly talked about melissa today.
steph was saying how much she admired her for her straight forwardness.
true true. i really admire her too..
but diff ppl got diff personalities...
if you are one that values affiliation toooo much.
you wont be able to enjoy her freedom.
how nice.. if we can just not care bout wat ppl think sometimess..
makes us as individuals so much more lively and truthful.

i was down today during dance.
randomly my dance mates walked up to me with concern.
i really appreciate it =))
thanks.. its just that pampers in between my legs.
darn irritating. if a guy is willing to wear that and DANCE for one day i give you 50 bucks.

breaking was fun. i'm really getting into it.
i'm gonna get my air freeze and elbow up ASAP.
the bboys are damn nice too.. they nv look down on us.
RB, HAZ, PUZHONG, LESLIE, KEVIN were all very very helpful and encouraging.
thanks BBOYS. =D

i miss clubbing and alcohol and cherries. HAHAHAH.
time to get some load off the shoulders mannnnnnnnnn.

totally missed out on clubbing nite with 2m02 laaaa!
they went zouk.
but i'll soon! RF jam coming. =)

i miss YOU for the whole of today..
mostly the fatty shoulder that will pop once in a while. ha!
we talked a lil last nite..
i wished i could tell you more! but i needed the sleep.
if only you could come for the production....

Anywae. just so you know.
so if you think you have many frens to spare. then gossip till your balls burst.
anywae. for guys to bitch. you're already ball -less.
and girls, we were ball less from the beginning.

the garden in my heart.messed.
8:34 AM

|Wednesday, March 04, 2009

Today as we were watching the juniors train,
raaz commented about them...then,

MC: hey. if you see your team mate doing something wrong what do you do?
R: just tell them ah!
MC: but you know some people they cannot take it right? and they might even gossip bout you after..
R: well. to accept or not is up to them. its their problem. but you should tell them..
Pris: i've changed. i don really do that anymore...
R: me also. cos some ppl dont know me wat...and they will think that i'm very rude wat.
MC: yea... its not appreciated by all.

I realised the 3 of us had something in common.
we were the frank ones in tpde.
i know pris and raaz... they'll just say things straight.
and yep. i do that too..
its not like we want to be the bad sometimes.
its just that we have more courage to tell...
and we've been losing since then...


Breaking has been awful..
obviously gin does not need us anywhere...
and yes. i feel we're in the way..
its not fair sometimes to think that you want us to breakthrough in 1 month.
some things.. you need more than one month.

And in all this sadness,
you'll also find who are really there for you..
and who are you effing fair weather frens.

i need a hugg.
its been only the 3rd day of training...

the garden in my heart.messed.
7:36 AM